Two wives, two lives and no balls

Why is it always the ugly blokes who think they're special? Brian Myerson is one of them. He's fifty, looks sixty and thinks he's thirty. You know the sort. He's one of those men who clearly thinks that money can buy can you as many lives as you want: he led two but his wife only knew about one. Surprisingly when she found out that he had another woman and child living around the corner she consulted a divorce lawyer and left him.

Brian is puzzled. He cannot understand why his wife Ingrid would do such a thing. After all he was a 'good husband'. Ms R may be able to help Brian out by pointing out that he is a liar. And stupid. He asserts that he didn't want 'subterfuge' so he told his friends and colleagues and even involved his teenage boys in his deception, but neglected to tell Ingrid. Ah, absolutely no subterfuge there then.

Of course at this point, Ms R's bright readers will be thinking how on earth Ingrid didn't know. Ms R has asked the same thing. She has only to look at a man and will know how many hours he slept and where he did it. Unlike women who are rather clever at hiding affairs, partly because men live in their own little world most of the time, men are rubbish at these things. A man who is having an affair may as well leave post-it notes around the house it is so obvious: the care he takes with his appearance, the change in his voice, the sudden excursions and, most of all, the extra attention to the woman he's with.

Maybe after twenty odd years you get cosy? But no, that's not true. Most women Ms R knows who've been married for years have seriously well-tuned antenna, sharper than that of the average girl. Maybe Brian was right in banking on the fact that his wife's comfortable lifestyle would stop her thinking about anything else? Does money make one blind?

Still what Ms R can't get over is Brian presenting himself as everyman, a loving husband and father who appears to think that his behaviour his perfectly acceptable and Ingrid is just not getting it. And now he wants to reduce her divorce settlement. Still it can't be hurting that much. Brian, you see would do it all again in one of the few heartbeats he has left. You have to wonder about Ingrid and hope that she's had some sort of awakening, albeit several years too late. But you really have to wonder about Brian and his ilk men who think that money buys them immunity. He thoughtfully point us to his role model, Sir James Goldsmith who is famously quoted as saying, "Once a man marries his mistress he creates a vacancy." Brian tells us that he sees parallels between Sir James and himself but forgets to add that Jimmy's wives knew about the mistresses. 

Ms R is not about the moral judgement here. That's Brian's choice. But what she doesn't get is that if he is unrepentant and proud of what he's done and 'would do it all again' why didn't he have the balls to tell Ingrid? Strip away the money, the jet, the cars and the bravado and you just have a gutless bloke.

Donations are happily coming in for my novel, a tale of sex, greed and hedge funders, told in Ms R fiction stylee. Do join. At $3.50 for all instalments (you can donate more if you want me to have pudding) it's better value than a Starbucks caffeine lactose solution. And there is a big pic of me on the site.